Thursday, March 22, 2018

Left.mn describes a DFL confab happening in a strong-DFL district, and my bet is the SD35 Republican convention this Saturday will not be chaotic, but as well organized as a Roman legion going to war.

Left.mn, here. Then, our good friends at SD35 Republicans, promising a March 24 weekend event.

Having no real affiliation with the latter situation, only able to guess, here's a forecast:

Credentials will be easy, there's an entry fee and nobody but hard-core would bother. Then all assembled. Salute the flag seven times before any dissention arises. It will be over the opening Bible reading, some wanting Old Testament, some Paul's favorite epistle (as they see it), ultimately Book of Revelations in its entirety being chosen, Abibale Whelan appointed to read.

Then after opening seven seals, the delegates will to Sons of Anarchy sound track music attempt to choose the HD 35A standard bearer. Having no consensus the question will be tabled. A motion from the floor for mellow choir music when the question is resumed will pass, and it will be so. "Yes, Jesus Loves Me" being the chosen tune.

As was pointed out to me in an email, there will be no dispute over HD 35B since Peggy Scott is the incumbent and incumbency carries the day among SD 35 Republicans. Scott's cosmetician will place her name in nomination; there will be a unanimous voice vote, and then the SD 35A question, previously tabled, will be resumed, with the suggestion of choice by mortal combat being voted down because at least one of the contestants will be against the idea.

There will be a hung convention, no endorsement, and since every candidate agreed to abide by the endorsement there will be lengthy debate over whether a candidate will be running in November at all; no endorsement suggesting no candidate.

Next, one of the party elders will suggest a primary, it will be a dandy idea unanimously approved by voice vote, and a motion to adjourn will be tabled so that Peggy Scott can, as HD 35B unanimous endorsee, read the Bible passage of her choice for the multitude. After her reading the food code from Leviticus, the confab adjourns, and party leaders will be allowed out first, with their chauffeurs, ditto for the Freedom Club guests from west metro, then the hoi polloi exits, marching in rank and file to Sousa music, and SEIU workers next enter and clean up the mess at the venue once the neo-Romans have left, triumphant.

Yes, it was Hannibal who went to war with elephants, not the Romans, but history has little matter with the elephant coded neo-Roman SD 35, else if history did matter church and state separation would be respected.

Perhaps a GOP SD 35 insider might suggest I have made wrong guesses. Perhaps not.

To the extent this agenda contradicts speculation of unfolding of events as posited above, don't believe that agenda, believe the guesswork here. That agenda includes no Bible readings, and these are true come to Jesus believing Republicans after all. Never forget that.